The Real Motherhood Series – Volume Five – Jayne’s Story
As part of the run up to Mother’s Day, we’re meeting some real mums and sharing their stories of what it’s really been like becoming a mother. These mums are friends and followers of Rosarts and believe that it’s massively important to share the truths about becoming a mum, because after all, the real stories that make up our lives are the best and most interesting!
Today we meet Jayne, who has two little boys, Anthony and Alexander.
Jayne, Anthony and Alexander
“Do I think it is important to talk about what it is to be a mum? Absolutely!”
Being a mum is definitely not what I expected and isn’t an easy ride…I continually surprise myself everyday with the choices I have made or my adopted parenting style! Some may say I am right, others may say I am wrong…but do I care what others think? No!
It is about my children and I am going to do what I need to for us both to survive the day.
Something that’s very important to me is that I want to make sure my little boys know I love them both equally and to the full. I think all mums probably worry about this, especially if they have more than one child.
My life has completely, 100% changed from what it was and do I think it is important to talk about what it is to be a mum – absolutely! I can only tell you my experience and that most definitely won’t be yours too, all children are different, but if it helps that one person that is having a rough ride or a bad day to smile or find an answer then I have done my best to help that person.
Before having children, I was a workaholic career woman – I didn’t want kids! The thought of them made me cringe so badly inside, but when I met my husband something changed inside me.
We tried for a baby but I still wasn’t convinced I wanted one, but wanted to make my husband happy as he was desperate for children. We then lost that baby, my world fell apart and I realised I wanted this and needed it, I wanted to be a mum.
We decided not to wait and tried again – and I fell pregnant straight away! We were overjoyed and I did everything I could to protect that little bean growing inside of me. I was desperate for a little girl, so when at our 20 week scan I was told I was having a boy, I went and sat in he toilet and cried, awful I know as it shouldn’t matter, but at the time it did.
Skip forward 17 weeks and when my little boy arrived, he was beautiful, he was everything I imagined a baby to be…a screaming, feeding, pooping machine! He was wonderful, but he was relentless and for the 14 months I breastfed him exclusively…he was like a leech!
He drained me of everything, sleep, nutrients and love…but I loved him so much I didn’t care that he was a little shit! He was constantly on the move, and into everything – so much so our lovely home got baby proofed to the hilt!
Every cupboard was locked, tables got moved, photos in their frames put away for another time, bases of flowers locked away, stair gates both ends of the stairs and he would still somehow manage to get into everything, or scale the cupboard drawers and hang off them…
To say that I changed is an understatement. I have gone from being a career driven, independent woman, not wanting children to now having two gorgeous little boys shackled to me every day.
So, do I want more? Well…yes! I totally would if my husband would let me and my youngest is only three months old!
As I write this it is 5am. I am breastfeeding my youngest whilst cuddling my eldest who is wedged in between me and my husband in the bed! Do I care that I don’t get a minutes peace or a full nights sleep? No. I would do anything for my little boys to make them happy and feel loved and that is what being a parent is.
It’s selfless, relentless, hard work and it’s a job that never sleeps – I am on duty 24/7 but I love it. So much so, I didn’t return to work after having my first. Instead, I poured all my time and energy into him, so when I now get complemented on the little boy he has become I beam with pride – I did that!
I made him, not only in my tummy, but on the outside too, I have made that little person into what he will become…let’s hope it’s for the better as he can be a bit unruly!
What have your experiences of becoming a mum been like – can you relate to Jayne’s story? Let us know your thoughts below and join in with the conversation over on the Facebook page and lets keep sharing the real stories!